One thing that I don’t like is indecisiveness. Guess what? I have become really indecisive over the last few days. Wear a TWA? Get a cute summer cut? Color it? Grow it out? Oh my goodness, chill out! I have to admit, I’m going through a bit of a mid-life identity crisis! J I think we all have these mini-crises, but warning, this post is a bit of a self-centered rant!
As I’ve mentioned, I’m turning 40 this month (in 12 days to be exact). Don’t get me wrong, I’ve never been one of those people who is afraid of aging or even dying for that matter. When I was turning 30 people warned me that I’d freak out, feel old, etc. Not! None of that happened. My husband arranged for one of my besties to make a surprise visit to Atlanta (where my husband and I first lived when we got married). My girlfriend and I proceeded to have a fantastic time at a wonderful spa and live it up! Thirty? A FUN, FUN time! So why am I tripping over turning 40? Perhaps it’s because I feel that my identity as a pretty girl is fading. I recently read the book, Getting the Pretty Back by Molly Ringwald and Molly discusses how the word “pretty” is often reserved for young women. Not 40+ year olds who may be described as beautiful, attractive, handsome (oh heck no) but usually not pretty. I sound like a vain old chick but I have to admit that I’ve noticed enlarging pores, extra drooping boobs, wider butt, flatter feet, fading eyesight. Yes, all in the last few years. Nothing pretty about it.
So, why the focus on my hair? I think my extra focus on my hairstyle is because it’s something that I can control. I need to feel like I have control over something; especially when I work out, cut out flour and sugar and still manage to gain two pounds. Yes, I’m being vain but I’m so telling the truth. However, I also hear that still quiet voice telling me to focus on more important life issues AND I hear that loud voice saying “Get your widening butt in the gym, work it out and shut up!” Wait, that’s my girlfriends. Just jokes!
Here’s to feeling good about ourselves!